For your 40th birthday: Rise above and take it in stride

Well, once again, I have been outshone by my siblings. After reading what Greg, Jeremy, and Kristen--and Mom--have written, I feel like anything I say will just sound stupid in comparison. But here I go anyway.
I remember always looking up to Jeff as someone I wish I were more like. Where I was shy and insecure, Jeff was bold and audacious. I was slothful and flighty, while Jeff was hardworking and dedicated. He still is, of course, so I shouldn't speak in the past tense.
I remember in the 5th grade, the teacher asked us to think about someone we admired and wanted to be like. Kids raised their hands and named baseball players (because it made them sound cool) and historical figures (because it made them sound smart). I raised my hand and said that I wanted to be like my brother Jeff, because he knew what he wanted and wasn't afraid to stand up for what he believed in. I sensed slight alarm in my teacher's eyes as I spoke, and I wasn't sure if it was because he knew Jeff personally or if it was simply because it was Washington City and I was expressing an independent thought. (In any case, it was nowhere near the alarm I saw in Wane Kittrell's eyes when I told him I was Greg's sister...)
I'm sure Kristen will agree that one of the great things about Jeff is that he always acts like he is happy to hang out with his little sisters. I remember going to the U of U drumline camp in the 10th or 11th grade, and Jeff picked me up and took Gail Whitney and me out on the town. This meant a trip to Greek Souvlaki #2 (or was it #1?), which seemed very exotic to a couple of Washington City gals. We laughed half the night about the woman who took our orders and asked each of us in the exact same lilting tone, "Cottage cheese and french fries? Or rice, instead of one of those?" I guess you had to be there, but we thought it was pretty damned funny.
Kristen already mentioned our trip to visit Jeff when she was 17 and I was 19. It was exciting for so many reasons--my first time on an airplane, my first trip to the East Coast, and my first time to visit Jeff in Pennsylvania. Jeff made us feel like there was nothing he would rather do than take his sisters around the big cities and try to smuggle Pop Tarts into the U.S. Senate. I'm sure we annoyed him plenty, but he never let it show.
When I graduated from college, I had decided that I definitely didn't want to teach high school, but I had no idea what I actually wanted to do...and quite frankly, I still don't know. But anyway, I remember talking to Jeff shortly after graduation, and he said, "Well, why don't you come out here?" The prospect of leaving comfortable old Utah was scary but exciting, and I accepted with hardly a second thought.
Jeff set me up with a job at CRA until I was able to find a job on my own, and he also gave me the use of his Corolla until he helped me buy my own--which I still have and which Dad said is the best car anyone in the family has ever owned. I had an amazing time in Pennsylvania, and living with Jeff and Christine was so much fun. Again, I'm sure I annoyed the hell out of them, but they didn't let it show. Princess, on the other hand, never forgave me for taking her room.
I feel like I grew up so much in that townhouse on Peter Grubb Lane, and I owe a lot of that to Jeff. He always had (and probably still has) more faith in my intelligence and my abilities than I ever did (or do). I only wish I had done a better job of adopting his work ethic--just imagine what I could do if I were half as tenacious as Jeff.
Jeff has been so generous to me and to the rest of the family. We had a blast at Lollapalooza a couple of years ago, and Mom's 60th birthday surprise with Barry Manilow was unforgettable--all thanks to Jeff.
So, old brother, I hope you have a wonderful 40th birthday! Thanks for always encouraging me to be better, inviting me to visit, and making me laugh time and time again. And thanks for always reminding us all: Rise above, take it in stride, and remember--you're better than everyone else. I love you very much!
Love, Michelle

What's your favorite Jeff quote?

Drafting

Following another cyclist so closely that the lead rider takes the brunt of the wind resistance, and acts as a wind-break for the drafting cyclist. As the lead rider moves through the air, a low-pressure area is created, reducing the wind resistance on the trailing rider. This low-pressure area is often referred to as the “slipstream”.

Depending on environmental factors (speed, winds, terrain, etc.), the “drafting” rider expends up to 25% less energy than the lead rider, while maintaining the same pace.

Being 22 months younger than Jeff, I’ve enjoyed life in his slipstream for many years.

As little boys, he always took the lead and I was eager to follow him. I’m not sure he knew where we were going, but if we got into trouble, he would take the brunt of it.

In elementary school, I had the same second grade teacher that had taught Jeff two years earlier. She was quite possibly the meanest person ever to teach school, often cussing at us, and almost never letting the class go to recess. Despite her seemingly evil disposition, she had very much liked Jeff, and two years later, I was the beneficiary. She called me “Jeff” more often than not, which was quite confusing to the boy in our class whose name actually was Jeff—especially when she’d say, “Well, you’ve all been bad, so nobody’s going to recess this morning except you, Jeff.” When Jeff stood up, she’d say, “Damnit, not you, Jeff. Greg, go to recess.”

(Continued...click here)

A Message from Anna

with love from your mother

I remember this about the day Jeff was born:

April 6th, 1968
My due date with Jeff was April 11th. Of course, my mother was hoping that I would wait and have her first grand child on her birthday, April 12th.
We had gone to the late movie the night of April 5th and had seen "Wait Until Dark." It had one part that scared the heck out of me. (Maybe it scared the baby out of me, too!) Anyway, a few hours later the contractions started. I woke up about three or four in the morning. I was very excited but I wasn’t sure if the pains were for real or not - they were not very bad and were not very close together.
By mid-morning, we were pretty sure that we were going to have a baby that day. I had an incredible burst of energy. I did the laundry, ironed all of Richard’s shirts and cleaned the whole house. Richard was watching General Conference on television and was keeping track of the time between contractions.

Click here to find out what happened next!

post Jeff ergo propter Jeff

When I was nine or ten, Jeff took me to the Washington City Pool one night when he was home from college. Instead of wasting any time trying to help me with my backstroke or dive, I have vivid memories of treading water while Jeff tried to explain to me the meaning of 'post hoc ergo propter hoc' and drilled me until I pronounced it correctly. (I also seem to recall a discussion of the different purposes of hyphens and dashes that night, although I'm now a little foggy about which one is which.) For anyone out there who didn't get this important life lesson from their big brother during an evening swim, 'post hoc ergo propter hoc' is a Latin phrase meaning "After this, therefore, because of this." And if my memory serves me correctly it is a fallacy... so, you can't just go around saying things like my title here:"Post Jeff ergo propter Jeff" i.e. I was born after Jeff, and therefore I exist because of Jeff. That would be a bit of a fallacy. However, in some ways I actually am who I am because I've been able to follow (or occasionally not follow) in my big brother's footsteps.

I have written a few of my favorite Jeff memories here. Hope you enjoy. And Jeff, I hope you feel properly eulogized. :) .... (Click here to read my trip down memory lane in its entirety.)

Blast from the Past: Images Courtesy of Harold and his Super Secret Vault

The One Habit of Highly Effective Jeff

My work ethic and professional ambition (such as they are...) were profoundly shaped by a single conversation I had with Jeff many years ago. I was just about to start my studies at the U. of U., and as I recall Jeff was just about to finish his. I was staying with Jeff for a couple of days in the apartment he shared with Jim Hodges. We were chatting over a meal of some leftover mushroom quiche Jim had made (which he had forced upon us, declaring "Dude, this quiche is [freak]in' ambrosia!"), and I was seeking Jeff's advice about how to succeed in college. Jeff, defying the grave predictions of the high school teachers and administrators, was a straight-A student; I was keenly aware that I had B.S.'ed my way to good grades in high school and that in college my incredible charm would no longer be sufficient to conceal my incredible sloth.

"So," I asked my eldest brother, "how do you succeed in college?"

Jeff's reply has remained imprinted in my mind over the years, and I recall it almost daily when I walk into my office and face a desk full of work. He said:

"It's simple, really. Figure out what you have to do. Then eat it, drink it, sleep it, and [pass] it [through your bowels] until it's done."

Since then, as I have counseled students on academic pursuits and career choices, I have passed on (various edits of) this advice, like a cherished intellectual heirloom. Perhaps I shouldn't make it public information, however. If all the clients that pay Jeff for repeated consultations knew that his best insight came in a condensed version, he might be out of a job.

Happy XLth, Jeff.

So what I was really hoping for here was to be able to post a video of one of Jeff's fantastic musical performances (either a Soulfish song or the karaoke video of Love Lift Us Up Where We Belong that we did in Vegas a few years ago). Lacking the technical capability to upload either of these, I have instead opted for this.

Anyone else remember Jeff doing a spot-on Fine Young Cannibals impersonation?

Group Gift to Paul's Kids

This post is part brag about Jeff/ part invitation to join in a group gift for those of us who are realizing (as we do around every holiday that involves looking for a gift for Jeff) that it is really hard to shop for him. Now that you've heard the disclaimer, read on, my friends, should you feel so inclined.If you know Jeff well enough to visit the birthday blog, then you've probably heard at least a little bit about his charity work with Paul's Kids.

And if you've ever seen Jeff pose for a photograph (like the one above, holding a little girl whose heart surgery was paid for by Paul's Kids), you know how rare it is to catch him actually smiling. You know, not just doing his usual I-think-I'm-smiling-but-I'm-frowning face. (For more photos of Jeff actually smiling, you can look here, here, or here.)

So we decided that if helping Paul's Kids makes him happy enough that he actually looks like he's happy, it must be a really good thing. Anyone who is interested in contributing to Paul's Kids in honor of Jeff's 40th birthday is welcome to do so. Here's a link to their donation page.

Ok, one last thing... if you haven't gotten enough of the Paul's Kids links, here's one more. At the bottom of the page linked here is a letter Jeff wrote about why they founded the charity, and I just think it's cool.

Guestbook

Let Jeff know you stopped by. Click 'comments' to leave your birthday wishes here.